Alpha Ascending Page 20

  “Is she like Caroline?”

  The question made him stop walking. Austin knew everything, of course. They all did, save for Katie and Jack. It was one of the conditions of being accepted into the rehab program. “No,” he found himself saying. “She’s not like Caroline at all.” Caroline was beautiful in an ethereal way—unreachable and cool. He thought himself in love with her, but she never saw him as anything other than a childhood friend. Once, he thought she would have been the perfect Lupa, someone who could be a good partner when he became Alpha. Maybe he had been more in love with the thought of her, or having something his own parents had—a perfect partnership, complementing each other’s strengths and weaknesses.

  “Then what is she like?”

  “What’s the point of this, Austin?” he snarled. Austin was torturing him with all these questions. He didn’t want to think about her. What he couldn’t have.

  “Hey, calm down, Lucas.” Austin stopped and pivoted, facing him and placed a hand on his shoulder. “I just want to talk. To know more about your Sofia.”

  “She’s not my Sofia.” And she never will be. He pushed Austin’s hand away. “She’s human, and she can never know about us.”

  “Now that’s just not true and you know it. There are plenty of humans in the know, like those who marry Lycans.”

  Lucas sidestepped and marched away from him, his teeth grinding together so hard that his jaw hurt. He heard Austin’s footsteps behind him, running up to keep pace. Thankfully, the other man didn’t say another word, seemingly content to just keep pace. Finally, he saw the ranch up ahead, and all the lights were on, the house like a shining beacon.

  “If you care for her so much, then why are you just letting her go?” Austin said in a quiet voice.

  God, he just wanted to get inside and lock himself up in his room, away from Austin’s nagging. “They’ve probably already erased her memory.”

  “Lucas—”

  “And the best thing I can do is let her go and let her lead a normal life.”

  A hand grabbed Lucas’s shoulder, spinning him around. “And what about what she wants?”

  “She won’t want me when she finds out what I am.”

  Austin’s eyes focused somewhere over his shoulder, then turned back to him. “Are you sure about that?”

  “Yes.”

  “In that case, you’re an idiot, Lucas.”

  Before he knew it, Austin whirled him back toward the house. “Wha—”

  “Take a good look, dumbass.”

  “Look where? I—”

  His chest squeezed so tight he could hardly breathe. Maybe it was the lack of oxygen that was making him see things. Because standing on the back-porch steps was Sofia. Even in the moonlight, he could see her beautiful face and the myriad of expressions that flashed through them—worry, surprise, apprehension—and finally, as their eyes met, pure happiness.

  “Lucas!” She was running toward him, her arms wide open as they crashed into each other. He didn’t even realize he’d been running to her too. His arms encircled her, crushing her to him and breathing in that delicious scent of hers as he nuzzled her hair.

  “You’re safe,” she murmured. “You’re okay.”

  He pulled back, brushing the locks of hair away from her face. Her eyes were shiny with tears. “Me? What about you? Those men—” He’d almost forgotten about those two men who broke into her home. The bruise on her jaw, however, was a clear reminder. Anger rose in him—at them, and at himself for failing to protect her from getting hurt in the first place. “Were they trying to rob you?”

  “It doesn’t matter.” She wrapped her arms around him.

  He stiffened. “What are you doing here? How did you get here? Do you remember what happened? Did—”

  “I do,” she interrupted. “I remember everything. They tried to take it away but—” She choked and put a hand over her mouth. “We should talk, Lucas.”

  He agreed. “Austin, I—” But his friend was gone. He must have slipped into the house quietly. “Let’s go for a walk.” He took her hand and pulled her along. When they were far enough from the house, he spoke first. “What happened? How did you get here?”

  “The last thing I remembered was seeing you on the floor of my apartment.” And then she relayed the events of what brought her here. As he suspected, they had taken her to the basement of Fenrir. He winced when she described meeting his father and then Adrianna and his mother. He smiled to himself, glad they were there to defend her.

  “And then I was on my way here. Your mom even lent me her jet,” Sofia continued. “And also, Astrid came with me. She explained everything to me, about … you guys.”

  “Lycans.”

  “Yes.” She wrinkled her nose. “It’s still confusing to me, about how it all works. Plus, she told me she and her siblings were all different too and that magic exists.”

  “Yes, witches and the warlocks are real too. And others. We have enemies, too.” He wanted to tell her about the mages, but it might be too much for her. Also, he realized that they had been walking for a long time and that she was shivering, despite being bundled up in a thick wool coat. As a Lycan, his body adjusted to the cold easily, which is why he was wearing only a shirt and jeans even though it was late winter. He steered her toward the nearest building—a barn that housed most of the heavy farm equipment used in the spring and summer.

  As he opened the door and gestured for her to go first, he asked, “Do you believe what she told you?”

  “I watched you turn into a wolf and then back again. How could I not believe it?” She let out a sigh as they entered the warm barn.

  He paused, trying to figure out how to phrase the question he wanted to ask her. “And did she tell you about me?”

  “Your sister implied that what happened wasn’t normal for your kind. When I asked Astrid about it, she said that was your story to tell.” She turned to him, her slate gray eyes clear even in the faint light. “Will you tell me, Lucas?”

  His throat closed up as the memories began to flood into his mind. He considered shutting down or telling her it was none of her business. That was his knee-jerk reaction whenever anyone tried to bring up the past. But when he stared down at her face, he couldn’t stop himself from telling her. “When Lycans shift, we’re fully aware of what’s happening and we can control our animal, or sometimes let it act on instinct. In the end, we’re always the one in charge.” He paused. “But not when bloodlust happens.”

  “Bloodlust?” she echoed.

  “No one’s really sure what it is or why it happens. It’s been described in our records, but never really seen or studied. In fact, it’s only been observed in one Lycan in the last few decades.”

  “Just one?”

  “Yes, one. Me.” The silence between them echoed as they both contemplated his words. Lucas reached out to brush an imaginary speck of dust on her cheek. “One of our doctors told me that it might be because both my parents are Alphas. Or because of what happened when I was a kid.”

  Realization swept over her face. “When you were kidnapped.”

  “The kidnappers—they hurt Adrianna. They hit her when she wouldn’t stop crying, and then one of them … he looked at her in a way that made my flesh crawl.”

  She swallowed audibly, and her body stiffened. “You saved her, right?”

  He nodded. “I shifted into bloodlust. I was ten, and it was virtually unheard of for anyone that young to shift. Whether it was because of trauma or my genes—I don’t know, it just happened. I was still small, so I only tore them up.”

  “And your family covered it up.”

  “Yes, that’s what we do, to protect our secret.” He waited for her to ask what he knew what was on her mind. To his surprise, she didn’t even say the name. So, he decided to lay it all out for her. “Kevin Hall.”

  “You don’t have to—”

  “I do. And if you hate me after this, then I understand.”

  “Lucas—”


  “Let me finish,” he pleaded. When she nodded, he continued. “Caroline and I had been friends since childhood. She’s one of us. And, well, I followed her around like a puppy throughout high school, but she only had eyes for Kevin Hall. They were together all of senior year. Then the night of the lake cabin party happened. I was inside with everyone else, and Jeffrey Smith, Kevin’s best friend, pulled me aside and said I had to come with him. I followed him out back, and that’s where I saw them.”

  The memory of that night was burned into his mind, and he struggled to continue. “She was on the ground, crying, pleading with Kevin to stop hurting her. I tried to get to her but Jeffrey held me back. Then Kevin began to scream at me. He … he said Caroline was pregnant. And that she had told him about our secret. Even shifted in front of him.” Apparently, Caroline thought they were True Mates and she had been excited to let him know. However, she was obviously incorrect as she didn’t heal from Kevin’s beating right away and their daughter turned out to be fully human. “He called her a disgusting animal and that he could never have gotten her pregnant, and so he thought I was the father. Then he kicked her again, and I lost it. I shifted in bloodlust, and that was the last thing I remember before waking up here. Adrianna and Zac were at the party, but they felt it when I shifted. They described it like a shockwave their wolves couldn’t ignore. They found me and saw that Kevin and Jeffrey were … on the ground. So yes, I did hurt them. I killed Kevin Hall.”

  He turned around, not wanting to look at her. Not wanting to see the horror in her eyes.

  “Lucas.” A gentle hand landed on his shoulder. “Lucas, don’t turn away. Look at me.” When he didn’t move, she stepped around and faced him. “You did it to protect Caroline and yourself. It was self-defense.” She took a deep breath. “Stop beating yourself up over it. If you didn’t know that she would have … I mean, who knows what would have happened?”

  He let out a bitter laugh. “It still doesn’t change the fact that I’m dangerous. This place … this is where my parents brought me after the incident. It’s a place where broken wolves are given a last chance.”

  “And it worked, right?”

  “For a while. But then …” Then the mages came and threatened Adrianna. And those men threatened Sofia. “I’m losing control. I don’t know what will happen … if you … if something happened to you, I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself.” Hell, he wouldn’t be able to keep living. “We can’t … you shouldn’t be around me.”

  She inhaled a sharp breath. “No. Lucas. You wouldn’t hurt me. You didn’t last night and you won’t ever hurt me.”

  “But—”

  “No, Lucas.” She gripped his forearms. “Listen to me. You protected me. Those men, they were going to kill me. But you were there and you saved me.” Her eyes, now more blue than gray in the scant light, were full of emotion. “I won’t let you take my memories away. I swear to God, if you even try to use that voodoo magic shit on me, I’m going to kick your ass.”

  The corners of his mouth tugged up. “I believe you would.”

  “This is who you are, Lucas.” She took his hands into hers. “And you’re not a bad person. I don’t even believe that wolf inside you is bad. The only times you shifted in bloodlust was when you had no other choice and had to protect others. Your sister. Caroline.”

  “You,” he added.

  “Yes.” She took a step forward and wrapped her arms around his waist. “Please, don’t let them take my memories of you away. I can’t—”

  She choked on her words, and he felt the wetness of her tears on his shirt. “Sofia, no.” He pulled her away gently, then brushed the tears away. “Don’t cry. Please don’t cry. You don’t know what it does to me.” Unable to bear seeing her like this, he leaned down and kissed her.

  He meant for it to be soothing, to comfort her. But when she responded so eagerly and her tongue swiped across his lips, the spark inside him lit into a full-blown flame. God, he’d missed her. Missed the taste of her, smell of her, feel of her in his arms. He lifted her up, wrapping her legs around him. Carrying her over to a corner, he lay her down on the soft pile of hay.

  She giggled against his mouth. “A roll in the hay, Lucas?” But she was already unbuttoning her coat.

  He grinned down at her as he whipped his shirt off. “I can’t think of a better activity right now.”

  The rest of their clothes were stripped off, though she kept her coat underneath her as a makeshift blanket. He kissed a path over her flat belly, then spread her legs so he could taste her. Her arousal mixed with her natural scent was a heady combination, and he stroked his hardened cock to ease the pain as he licked and sucked her to orgasm.

  “Lucas.” Her voice was raspy with need. “Inside me. Now.”

  He didn’t need a second invite. Placing himself between her legs, he nudged at her entrance. She inhaled and her chest rose as he began to fill her, pushing all the way in until he was fully lodged in her. God, she was so tight and hot and perfect. She let out a whimper when he moved his hips and then clenched around him.

  “Sofia.” He captured her mouth again, this time his lips ravaging hers, seeking her surrender. She opened up to him letting his tongue sweep inside to devour her. He felt her hips pushing up at him and knew what she wanted. He too, wanted that friction, that feeling of sliding in and out of her. But he wanted to take things slow and savor her.

  She let out a gasp as he trailed his mouth down her neck, searching for all her sensitive spots, licking and sucking at her soft flesh and moving down to her breast. Slowly, he moved. Teased her by pulling back and then thrusting into her, grinding his hips against her. As his mouth drew in a nipple, he continued his deliberate movements, drawing out gasps and moans and sighs from her.

  Her fingers dug into his shoulders as his pleasure built up. “More, Lucas.” She raked her nails down his back, her hips urging him to move faster.

  “God, you’re beautiful,” he said as he looked down at her. He kept his gaze on her as he rocked his hips, picking up his pace. He reached down and found her clit, then plucked at the bud. This sent her over the edge, and he watched her face twist in ecstasy as she came, crying his name and squeezed around him. He grunted, trying to get ahold of himself. Not yet.

  Though she was coming down from her orgasm, her thighs tightened around him, urging him deeper and faster. He obliged, that sweet friction building up his own orgasm. His thrusts became frenzied, pushing harder and deeper. It was all too much—her sweet pussy milking him, her cries of pleasure, and her scent intensifying as she was nearing her peak. When she cried out his name again, he let go, releasing and filling her with his hot come. He gave a few more short thrusts, trying to prolong his pleasure and coaxing another smaller orgasm from her.

  He collapsed on top of her, strength draining from his body. He felt spent, but also, at peace. Before he closed his eyes, a lingering thought echoed in his mind. So this is what it was like to make love.

  Chapter Twenty

  When Sofia woke up the next day, she felt sore, in a delicious way. There was an ache between her legs that made her feel wicked. Hell, everything about Lucas made her feel wicked.

  They had a quick nap after their little roll in the hay, but she didn’t want to go back yet. She wanted to have Lucas to herself, just for a little while, but also, she was embarrassed because she didn’t even make small talk with the people in the house. The two women in the house greeted her warmly, and Astrid had mentioned she was related to them in some way, which is why she volunteered to come here. She had introduced herself, but when Astrid announced that Lucas was outside, she quickly forgot her manners and rushed out of the back door.

  And so, they stayed in the barn, wrapped up in each other’s arms, content just to be in each other’s company. She had so many questions about them and their kind, and he answered as patiently as he could. When it was late enough, they snuck into the house quietly and crept up to his room. Lucas tried to get frisky with her again,
but she pushed his hands away, afraid that the people inside would hear them. He had laughed and told her that all the rooms were sealed and soundproofed, as many Lycan parents took precautions because of enhanced hearing and smell. Though she felt mollified by his explanation, she did her best to keep quiet the entire night. Lucas, on the other hand, seemed to enjoy coaxing her to scream, and he succeeded in making her moan his name loudly in ecstasy.

  “Good morning, sweetheart.” Lucas’s lips were pressed against her neck. His voice was rough with sleep, sending little vibrations across her skin.

  “Hmmmm.” She twisted around to face him, her palms immediately going to his jaw. He’d always been clean-shaven, but now he had two days’ worth of stubble around his face. “I like this look.”

  His mismatched eyes danced with mischief as he rubbed his jaw on her cheek, making her shriek. “Like that?”

  “Ha!” She pushed at his chest, which only made him hold on to her tighter.

  “It’s early,” she said, looking outside. The sun had just finished rising, bathing the room in early morning light.

  “Actually, it’s late,” he chuckled. “Jackson’s probably been out for at least two hours and breakfast will be ready soon.”

  “I can’t believe you spent a couple of months here, doing chores.” He had explained to her about his rehabilitation and how the people here helped him.

  “Believe it. I hated it at first, you know? But it was good for me.”

  “I still can’t picture it.” Lucas steering cattle. Riding horses. Using a lasso. Wearing a cowboy hat. Or maybe he was shirtless. Yeah, that was good. Lucas, his bare chest and torso, working under the sun. Baling hay or whatever the hell one did with hay. Sweat pouring down his perfect six pack and—

  “Stop that.” His nostrils flared and his eyes darkened.

  “Stop what?” she asked innocently.

  “You’re thinking about sex.”